(Picture by Louise Docker, CC BY 2.0, Wikimedia Commons)
This post originally appeared on the Times of Israel.
What is a ‘Love Language?’
In his book, “The Five Love Languages,” Gary Chapman describes a common problem couples have in expressing and receiving love from one another. The problem is that different people experience love, and want to be loved, in different ways. We generally try to show love and affection for others in the way we would like to receive it. For example, if you need to hear loving words spoken to you to feel loved, you will most likely use that method to express your love to others. The problem is, they may best receive love given in a different way, perhaps by touch.
Chapman recognizes that most people are not so simple, and may appreciate more than one, or all five of the ‘love languages’ to varying degrees, but he suggests learning the ‘love language(s)’ of the one you want to give to, so you can give in a way they can most readily receive. The five ‘languages’ Chapman describes are, not necessarily in this order:
- Words of Affirmation: Saying “I love you,” or “thank you for…”, for example.
- Acts of Service: Doing things for your beloved, like washing the dishes or changing a diaper.
- Gifts: Preparing gifts, things or experiences to give to the one you love.
- Quality Time: Spending time giving focused attention to each other.
- Touch: Hand-holding, hugs, dancing, sexual intimacy.
Do Jews Love G-d?
I saw a video recently about a shop owner in the Old City of Jerusalem who spends a lot of time explaining Judaism to Christians. He said that he was surprised to discover that many Christians don’t know that Jews love G-d. Rather they think we “love Law.” I was struck by how wrong this perception is, but I can see how the misunderstanding happens.
Continue reading on my Times of Israel blog